God’s timing is impeccable. My friend, Pastor Jason, asked me to preach at his church, Bartley Christian Church, this coming Sunday. He asked me some time ago. I now find myself preaching on sabbath as my last sermon before I start on my own sabbath in October. It’s a bit hard to take a sabbatical when you are serving your own ministry. There is no one to whom you apply to for a sabbatical. But I felt it was time, especially in the year I turn 70.
Two obvious purposes for the sabbatical are: 1) to rest, I am feeling tired; and 2) to seek the Lord as to how He wants me to live, going forward. I also want to use some of that time to reflect on how I can help my peers (re)discover their calling at the later years of life.
One of the reasons why God gave us the gift of the sabbath is to help us to fight off the idolatry of work. We have been given important work by God, but we were never meant to make work our God. Having to down tools one day in seven helps us to fight off this temptation. This principle is extended to longer sabbath periods, too.
Eugene Peterson says one reason why many in church-related work are constantly tired is our vanity. He writes:
I am busy because I am vain. I want to appear important. Significant. What better way than to be busy? The incredible hours, the crowded schedule, and the heavy demands on my time are proof to myself—and to all who will notice—that I am important. (1)
There was a time when I hardly received any invitations to minister. My divorce made me unsuitable for ministry in many people’s eyes. Time passed. I went through church discipline. I went through the valley of depression. Slowly, people began to trust me again and I had more and more opportunities for ministry. Nevertheless, I was still an outlier.
With the passing of time I became more and more acceptable. I was now acceptable to the church in general and began to receive many invitations to preach and teach. I didn’t quite realise this change in my acceptability till I did an interview for some seminary students for a project they were doing. Towards the end of the interview one of them asked me how I felt now that my face and name were everywhere, meaning I was now preaching and teaching often and with different groups.
His question was a wake-up call. It hit me that I was no longer an outlier and that I was now invited to speak frequently and by many different groups. It was a red-flag moment. I was now in danger of pride. Perhaps I was making up for lost time. I enjoy preaching and teaching. God had given me gifts in this area. I wanted to bless people with my gifts. But I was saying yes to too many invitations.
I hope the upcoming sabbatical will remind me that I am not indispensable (of course I am not) and that I must not let my ministry define me. Pride will give birth to burn-out and burn-out may lead to worse. So, for three months, no speaking engagements except for two which were committed to under special circumstances. I want to be firm but not legalistic.
My commitment to not preach and teach in the last quarter has been tested. I have received invitations to speak on topics and with groups that are very dear to me. I felt really sayang — regretful — that I had to say no to them. But it is really helpful to have made a commitment ahead of time.
So, this Sunday I will be preaching on “sabbath”. The preparation and delivery of the sermon will remind me of why I am taking my sabbatical.
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(1) Eugene Peterson, The Contemplative Pastor, (Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans, 1989),18.