What are some principles for ministering to young people?
 
Recently I have been clearing out my books and of course I rediscovered some gems that I had forgotten about. One was Hear My Story (2003) by Dean Borgman. Although a bit dated it still contains much wisdom in the area of ministering to youth.

All of us need attention. Our efforts seek affirmation, our needs crave attention, our hurts seek healing, and our hopes prosper with encouragement. Jesus was a master in the way he attended to individuals. He noticed, he asked questions and listened, and he often touched as if to affirm his listening care. (1)

Borgman believes that ministering to the young includes the following steps. (2)

• Attracting young people to a safe place. 
• Providing young people with caring mentors.
• Enabling young people to hear someone else’s story. 
• Empowering young people to tell their own stories and be affirmed.
• Sharing the story of God’s love. 

Although Borgman published his book in 2003, his five steps are still relevant to ministry to youth and young adults today, but I am sure Borgman himself would agree that the steps are not neat and sequential — more a summary of the things needed in ministering to the young.
 
1. A safe place
The young are going through a scary transition in their lives. Struggling to establish their identity they fear being criticised or judged as they try different identities and values for size. A ministry to young people must provide a safe place where they are accepted and feel safe enough to process their life. This does not mean we endorse or agree with all that is in the young person’s life but that we provide a safe place that respects their journey and encourages them to process their questions with others.
 
2. Caring mentors
Who will provide the young with a safe place? Caring mentors! Young people need those older and more experienced to guide their development. What they don’t need are mentors who are primarily instructors who “mentor” by teaching and micromanaging their mentees. Young adults need to be helped to discover the truth for themselves. In an internet world the young can go online to discover content for themselves. What they need are mentors who love them and who will journey with them as caring guides.
 
3.  Enabling young people to hear someone else’s story
The young need to know and articulate their stories in their journeys of healing and growth. They are inspired to reflect on their own stories when they hear others sharing their stories. This could be one of the things a mentor could do. Such stories must be honest accounts that recount joys and sorrows, successes and failures. When young people hear such honest stories, they are inspired and shown how to tell their own stories, which allows them to process their individual journeys.
 
4.  Empowering young people to tell their own stories and be affirmed
Helping the young discover their own unique stories is the critical first step to having them connect their stories to God’s story. Encouraging the young to tell their own stories helps them discover themselves and their worth, to help them invest in their journeys of wholeness and purpose. A mentor helps by asking open-ended questions and by empathetic listening. When a young person is heard it helps him/her understand he/she is important and therefore deserving of attention and development.
 
5. Sharing the story of God’s love 
Ultimately, the young need to hear God’s story and know (or know afresh) how much God loves them. They need to know how much God wants to heal them and help them be their best selves; people with the agency to make a difference in the world. Many who work with the young tend to jump straight to this stage. While it is our goal for the young to encounter God, there are no short cuts. The young need to know their stories and their worth before they can appreciate God and welcome His saving presence.

We all need help to be able to follow Christ in a rapidly changing world. In particular, the transition from youth to adulthood, remains a particularly critical transition because what a young person decides to be and to do at this stage of life will very much dictate their trajectory for the rest of their lives. The church needs to take seriously how we disciple the young. The steps that Borgman proposed in 2003 remain relevant. If anything, they look even more needed for our ministry to young people today.

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(1) Dean Borgman, Hear My Story (Peabody, MA: Hendrickson Publishers, 2003),13.
(2) Dean Borgman, Hear My Story, 12.