You did not choose me, but I chose you. — John 15:16
He came unexpectedly, before I knew I needed him.
As I reflected on how Twinkie first came into my life, I considered how God, too, arrived like an unexpected Guest. I had been a Christian for some time now, so God was already in my life. But I believe God wanted to snuggle up real close to me in a very tangible way. God never imposes, though, but I realise God is sneaky, making Godself so irresistible that you cannot help but welcome God with open arms.
I did not find God. God found me.
They say that you don’t find a cat; the cat finds you. That is true for God too. You may not realise you are seeking God, or indeed that you even need God. But, hidden and waiting, God will find you. God was already in my heart long before I realised it. When I found God there after years of searching in all the wrong places, I felt a light turn on in my heart, and a voice said, “Welcome home, I’ve been waiting for you.”
I had not planned on getting a cat. A dear friend of mine was, and I accompanied her. So how did I end up going home with a cat?
While my friend fussed over the other cats parading around the open-concept pet shop specialising in ragdoll cats, I was somehow drawn to one shy kitten among the others. He did not try too hard to get my attention, but lay almost hidden, a tiny furball of white and orange amidst a sea of white and grey. I was told this one was named Twinkle.
Twinkle took to me naturally, and I to him. The little three-month-old kitten nestled against my chest and purred contentedly. The shopkeeper noted that Twinkle seemed particularly drawn to me. Of course, I felt she was just trying to make a sale then. Thing is, I felt particularly drawn to him too. We were inseparable.
When my friend started picking out food and drinking bowls and cat food for me, I protested in vain, wondering why she wasn’t the one bringing a cat home. Resistance was truly futile. The deal clincher? The shopkeeper proclaimed that Twinkle was born on Christmas Day.
And so that was how I was made to invite God into my home (God is sneaky, remember?). Disguised as a tiny and irresistible flame-coloured ragdoll cat named Twinkle. I called him Twinkie, a more affectionate name and perhaps my way of taking ownership of him.
Psalm 139 is one of my favourite psalms. It reminds me of a God who knows me through and through. I had no intention of getting a cat that day, but the minute our eyes met, it truly was Love at first sight. God winked at me and, like Jeremiah, I was seduced:
O Lord, you have seduced me, and I was seduced. — Jeremiah 20:7 (paraphrased)
Somehow saying “yes” was the most natural thing. God knew what I needed before I even realised it.
Of course, God let me think that I was free to say “no” too. But how could I resist those blue eyes?
I guess you could say that God came, with a twinkle in the eye.
When Twinkie passed on, I was near inconsolable. Even as he grappled with diabetes, my heart ached. I am a writer, so I wrote. I wrote to process my feelings, to let all the emotional toxins out as words on a page. It was cathartic.
Words expressed my pain but also filled me with gratitude. How lucky am I to have experienced the unconditional love of God through the daily loving of a cat whom I had no intention of adopting to begin with. As I wrote, I saw God’s hand and heart in the indescribable bond that had formed between Twinkie and me.
What surprised me was how my writing resonated with others. Friends asked me to write more, even those who did not have cats or other pets. There was something about that relationship which had God’s presence written all over it that attracted readers. I also realised that not many people wrote about grief, and they responded to my journey through grief.
This is in answer to that encouragement, and also in answer to the desire in my heart to share the story of my journey with my cat. I wanted to celebrate Twinkie’s life in remembering his passing. Because all that he taught me carries me through, and perhaps this book is the appropriate response to honour him.
Most importantly, Twinkie taught me about relating to God. Twinkie drew me closer to our beloved Creator, to the God who loves me unconditionally, to the God who has blue eyes.
Twinkie was born on Christmas Day.
He came in a whisper. He came with a whisker.
He came unexpectedly, before I knew I needed him.
He chose me, I did not choose him.
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Reproduced from Anthony Siow, preface to God Has Blue Eyes (Singapore: Graceworks, 2026), xi–xiii. Anthony Siow is a spiritual director trained in the Ignatian tradition. He runs a ministry founded on the Ignatian invitation to find God in all things, which explains why he is able to find God in his furry companion of 14 years. Anthony continues to dedicate his life to helping others encounter God in the arts, in the ordinary, and even in a cat with blue eyes. Anthony can be reached at seek.anthony@gmail.com.