Bernice and I were catching up with two dear friends recently. Husband and wife, they were doing critical work for the Kingdom where the Lord had placed them. They were far from being luddites but one of the things we talked about was our shared concern that the young were spending more and more of their time interacting with screens (smart phones) and programmes (AI), and increasingly less time in face-to-face meaningful dialogues. We, and many studies, have noted the detrimental effect this trend has been having on their emotional life and their ability to have healthy relationships with others.
This discussion we had took place a week before Christmas. No one knows for sure the exact date when Jesus was born but all agree that “the Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us” (John 1:14a NIV). The divine entered history as a person and He spent His last three years on earth focusing on a personal relationship with 12 people — His disciples — while focusing on three of them, Peter, James, and John. In addition, He had close friends, like Mary, Martha, and Lazarus (John 11:1). And Mary was commended for her personal response to His teaching (Luke 10:38–42).
We have a lot of material on our theological beliefs about Jesus and we have a lot of material on what Jesus taught. But we don’t take seriously enough how Jesus taught. Yes, He ministered to the masses but His most critical teaching was done personally and relationally. We now encounter God through His Word, the Bible, but Paul’s call to the Corinthian Christians to follow him as He followed Christ (1 Corinthians 11:1) and John’s recognition that there are some things that can only be communicated face to face (2 John 12) is evidence enough that Christian, and I would dare say, human communication is best done personally and relationally.
We can’t turn the clock back. The internet and AI are with us to stay and they give us many benefits. But we should push back against the loss of the relational and the personal in human interaction. Our chat with our friends gave fresh encouragement for what we have tried to do, and what we will continue to try to do at Graceworks — championing spiritual friendship and healthy small groups, both based on a foundation of personal relationships and conversations that help to knit people together.
Two nights ago, I was in a Zoom call with the leaders of a regional Christian Medical organisation. We were evaluating how the ministry had gone this year and one of the things we agreed on was that a crucial factor in the strengthening of our work was the number of occasions when we had face-to-face meetups. That had strengthened the friendships between the members from the different countries in the region and these bonds had resulted in the mutual encouragement and collaboration that had led to significant growth in our work. Last night’s discussion was on Zoom and we acknowledged that such communication technology enabled some degree of face-to-face communication when we couldn’t meet in person. But we agreed that face-to-face fellowship would continue to be a central part of our culture.
Here’s a thought. This Christmas, like many Christmases, there will be many large-group, well-rehearsed, and loud Christmas celebrations. Why don’t you spend some quiet moments with a friend, or a family member, to catch up over how the year has been. Share some high points, some low points, and some turning points in 2024. Jesus did His most significant ministry personally and relationally. Be like Jesus.