“I don’t think our church is ready for an Indian senior pastor.”
That was an unsolicited comment made to me one Sunday in church. I assumed that the person who was addressing me was thinking of what had been going on in the political world and decided to extrapolate it to our local church context. Whatever the reason, it certainly caught me off guard. I laughed it off, but afterwards I could not help feeling rather disturbed ….
I remember another occasion—again in church—when I was a teenager. A friend made a racist joke (which I did not register as racist at the time), then looked at me and said, “It’s ok—Dev is basically Chinese, right?” Again, nervous laughter from me ….
Growing up ethnically Singaporean, I had no reason to think that I did not belong—this is my country, is it not? Yet at every stage of life, there have been occasions like the ones above. These were moments that made me feel as if I were not the same—moments that highlighted my difference and made me feel that, as an other, I was merely tolerated, rather than embraced.
One Chinese New Year, surprise, surprise, I was rostered to do the preaching yet again (being the token non-Chinese pastor)! So, this time I took it upon myself to preach about race. The Scripture text was from Ephesians 2—with the angle of the sermon going along the lines that Christ has torn down every dividing wall in the church. Just as there should not be any Jew or Gentile, I remember my first draft concluded that we should be “race-blind” in church. We should all treat each other in the same way, as we are one in Christ.
However, upon further study, I wondered if that was really what the Bible was teaching? Are we all made to be the same? That would not fit with my understanding of the Trinitarian God who made the world in all its beautiful diversity. I changed the conclusion. It was not about feeling that you are no different from the crowd. It was about accepting that God has made each of us other—with different races and genders, different backgrounds, abilities, and roles to play. The church is not a place to go greyscale, but the Kingdom of God, even to eternity, is destined to be in brilliant colour. How this works out in practice … that I am still trying to discern.
Reflecting personally, I wondered … is it ok for me to accept that I am Indian? Wow … that was hard to say … it’s still hard to write down. I am Indian. Why is it hard? Because it highlights my difference—a difference that was (and still is) programmed to be an embarrassment rather than a privilege.
When I boil it down, the race thing to me seems not really about the differences in my skin colour or geographical origins, but about whether I feel like I am part of the family. Jesus promised us, through baptism, that we are born into a divine household. He has welcomed us wholeheartedly despite our sins. The more I understand that, the more it hurts when the body of Christ seems to put up a dividing wall and inadvertently withhold certain levels of fellowship and intimacy. It hurts especially to those of us who have always felt like a minority in society.
I am by no means ignorant of how hard it is to integrate people from different backgrounds … but I think it is paramount that every local church makes some effort. I do not mean purposely including people from different races at all leadership levels—that sounds merely like political correctness. I think it is rather about seeing whom God brings to your church’s door. If they are there, it means Christ has welcomed them, and now He wants you to learn how to do it too. How do we welcome this person—to feel like he or she is part of the family, while retaining his or her difference? How do we encourage this person to use his or her unique gifts to add a new colour to our current experience of the gospel story?
So … do I feel welcome in my own church? After 40 years? Especially when I am the pastor?
The truth is, I do not really know. I am not sure if it is the church’s fault or my own skewed interpretation of events. Perhaps that is one of the most dangerous things about this race issue—no matter what others do—you will never feel truly welcome. God help us!
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Adapted from Dev Menon, “The Indian Pastor,” in Colours of the Kingdom, ed. Nicole Ong, Ng Zhi-Wen, Ronald JJ Wong, Prarthini M. Selveindran, Jonathan Cho, Tan Soo-Inn (Graceworks, 2021), 38–42, in commemoration of Racial Harmony Day (21 July).
Part of the “Good News for Bruised Reeds” series, this book presents personal stories and theological, pastoral, and practical reflections on issues of ethnicity, nationality, racism, and inclusive hospitality in the church. This essay has been edited for brevity and clarity.